God's Unfailing Love

I would do almost anything to put off homework...

The bachelor, Jake, lives in the same community my grandmother does. In my opinion, the show is a bunch of bull and the worlds view at love sucks. Media has skewed love into being something that is perfect. An emotion that will never go through ups and downs. The only love that is perfect is God's love. That is the only perfection we will ever feel, yet we seem to always doubt Him. As humans, if we can doubt our creator, Father, lover, and friend...then what makes us think that another human is perfect and the love they supply is perfect? People will let you down. They will make mistakes. BUT they will only hurt you if you believe they are not capable of hurting you. If you put them on a pedestal, then they will break your heart, because they have to come down eventually.

May the Lord direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance. -2 Thessalonians 3:5

Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands. -Deuteronomy 7:9

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever. -1 Chronicles 16:34

All my intimate friends detest me; those I love have turned against me. -Job 19:19
((people will let you down, turn to the Lord))

I could seriously go on a very long time quoting scripture about God's amazing love. But I believe this sermon does it a lot better than I can. If you have time listen to God's word.

http://itunes.apple.com/podcast/the-village-church-sermon/id82014403
((scroll down to 10/25/09 which is about love in marriage OR 2/28/10 which is about feeling accepted))

OHH EMOTIONSS!

I must get everything out on here, before I explode and say mean things that I will regret later. I have been in this place of the unknown for so long and every time I feel like I have escaped I get sucked right back in. The Lord is funny and I believe all this is happening so I will turn to Him and continue to have faith that He will provide. I don't even know my own feelings. I would love to say that I understand my heart, but I really don't want to. Jeremiah 17:9 states "The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no one can figure out." I don't want to follow my heart. My heart will lead me astray. I want to follow God and His plan for my life. This journey of figuring that out is getting old and I just want answers. I feel that I have been waiting patiently and that my time is here. It is my turn to be happy. The verse after continues to say "But I, God, search the heart and examine the mind. I get to the heart of the human. I get to the root of things. I treat them as they really are, not as they pretend to be." WOW. Fall on my knees is awe of my King. He knows my desires, but maybe what I want is not what is going to bring Glory to Him. After all, that is why I am here. The past 7 months have shown me a lot about my faith in Him. I would pray constantly for a certain thing. That He would take this boy out of my life completely, because I did not want to like him. Well, God had other plans. This boy is a good friend of mine. I still pray that prayer though, but instead of taking him out of my life, I pray for this boys heart. That the Lord would tug on it and that he would be transformed. The state of the unknown comes into play here. I know nothing about how he feels...nothing. I am scared. I am scared to take that next step and put my heart on that line. Everyone keeps telling me their two cents, but in the end it is up to the Lord and what He wants. I believe I am doing what I am supposed to be. waiting. waiting. smiling. waiting. crying. waiting. waiting.

IN OTHER LACEY NEWS:
be in prayer that I research the opportunities the Lord wants me to take.

Freedom in the Lord

I cannot believe that this semester only has 3 weeks left. 3 horrific weeks ahead of me.

The Lord has been doing wonders to my heart over the past couple of months. I am continuing to grow in His word. I have been studying different people in the Old Testament and I have loved all of them, because they help me realize that I can mess up and make mistakes, but God still loves me and He still uses me to glorify His name. It also helped realize that God is not here to make me feel comfortable. He is not here to make life easy. His purpose is to spread His name throughout the world and He is going to use me to do that.

I haven't really been praying about doing missions over seas, because I think I am scared. I am scared, because I know what the answer will be. Following God is never going to be easy and it takes courage. Right now I am praying for courage. The Lord told my mom along time ago that I was supposed to go. But figuring it out on my own is the difficult part. Everything has always been spoon fed to me and this past year I have grown up and I have dug deep into the word. I have discovered new and exciting things through following God's Will. I pray for faith. True faith.

Abraham took up everything and left his home. 12 verses in Hebrews 11 was dedicated to Abraham's faith. He made mistakes on his journey, but the Lord still fulfilled His promise.

I want to surrender everything. Nothing I have is mine. Why is it so hard to let go of something that is not even mine to begin with?

waiting.

Summer has ended and school has slowly taken over my life. I expected this, so no surprises were made in that area.
BUT several things have crept into my life that I love or hate.

The first surprise of fall 09 is work. I got a job. I love my job. I don't work a lot and the hours I do work are flexible. My boss is an amazing woman. I help sort t-shirts, hot press t-shirts and maybe one day I will print t-shirts, but for now I do what is needed. I have only worked one day, but I can tell that this will be something I will enjoy doing for a while.

The second surprise is how amazing it feels to actually be living on my own. I love it. I love my roommates and everything that we have put into this place. I love walking to class. Those morning and afternoon walks bring me closer to the Lord everyday.

And the final surprise is something from far right field. I NEVER saw this coming this soon. I think I wanted it to happen, but now that it has it freaks me out. I am so terrified that I am misunderstanding what the Lord is telling me. My prayer about a thousand times a day is that the Lord protects my heart and that my heart is also open to different opportunities involving this person. I prayed that the Lord kept him away from me if nothing is to come from this. BUT the Lord said His power is greater and put this particular person e v e r y w h e r e . literally, every event I went to he was there. So, I know that the Lord put this person in my life for a reason, and figuring it out right now is not so fun when a ball of emotion is scrambling inside of me wanting to explode.

Lord, give me the patience to wait.

True Love

a lot has happened in the past 3 months.

the first big thing that happened was my birthday. I turned the big 21. it was an amazing day and it got better when my family flew in to surprise me! :)

I need to release emotions, so here it goes.

my grandpa passed away april 17th. it was a shock to everyone. when i was younger i would think about how i would feel when someone i loved would leave me and i would get more upset with certain loved ones. i wasn't extremely close to my grandpa when i was younger, so i never imagined the amount of pain i would feel. but, i had an amazing opportunity to live with my grandparents for the past 18 months and it has been one of the best things for me. my grandpa welcomed me into his home with open arms. he kept me on track and focused in school. i learned so much about him and his experiences in life. he was an amazing man whose life was cut short, but who are we to tell God who to take? (Job 12:9) if my grandpa would tell you a story about himself, it was only to teach you a lesson. he loved history and he would gladly tell you everything he knew about every subject.

my grandpa was an amazing man of God.
pray for my nana.

I am now in Georgia spending time with my beautiful family and my wonderful best friend. we are counting down the days til we board our cruise ship (3 days)

I am on fire for my King.

I am so in LOVE with my Lord. He is wonderful. He has changed my heart. He brought restoration to my soul. I am better because of HIM. I live for HIM. He took my pain. He took my shame and in it's place HE gave me JOY!!!

HE takes my mourning and turns it into dancing.
HE takes weeping and turns it into laughing.
He takes my sadness and turns it into joy.


oh, how grateful I am that HE loves me everyday. He is patient and persistent with me.

He calls me by name!(john 10:3)

"Jesus ALWAYS knocks before entering. He doesn't have to. He owns your heart. If anyone has the right to barge in, Christ does. But He doesn't. That gentle tap you hear? It's Christ. ((Behold, I stand at the door and knock)REV 3:20) And when you answer, He awaits your invitation to cross the threshold."
max lucado-a love worth giving

loving grandparents

living with both my dad's parents and my mom's parents at one point really makes me giggle. most of us see our grandparents as people who gives us cookies and hugs. we don't get to see them that often so they don't get on our nerves. we love them because they love us. living with them will change your perspective, at least mine did. i didn't realize that they were real people with issues like everyone else. they get in pointless arguments like every other married couple. i love all of them deeply and i have learned so much from all of them. i knew nothing about them before, now i think i know more than i would ever want to know :)

my grandpa (mom's stepdad) is a nerd. a big one. it's not bad at all. if you ask him ANYTHING he will tell you every little detail he knows about the situation. no doubt. he is brilliant. he was in the marines. he was a very successful business man. now he is retired and sits at home controlling what my nana eats. we call him the food nazi. he tends to obsess over calories. i love him a lot and he teaches me more than i would ever care to learn about any given topic.

my nana (mom's mom) is a hoot. she is one of my favorite people. i can be sarcastic and honest with her and she snaps right back. she knows how sassy i can be and handles it well. she loves me more than i will ever know. she has so much pop culture knowledge stored in her brain it's crazy. never play ANY board game with her. you WILL lose. she would talk to the wall if it talked back. i can picture her being a greeter at walmart, but an overly nice one. one that would chase after you if you didn't acknowledge her. she complains a lot, but that's cuz she's in a lot of pain. she needs a knee replacement and has already had a hip replacement. i tend to ignore her ooos and ughs, but some days are worse than others. if given the choice she would have someone waiting on her all the time. ((who wouldn't want that???))

my pappap (dad's dad) is a real badass. totally. he is basically the best person to get advise from. he was there for me when i was broken. he helped put me back together. i admire his strength. he hasn't smoked in two years after like more than 50 years of smoking. amazing. he sits on his back porch with a glass of wine and shoots the rats that run across the fence. badass. he can never hear me, but he listens so hard. i never know if he is serious or just kidding. i get in trouble sometimes when i think he is kidding when he is really serious. my father is just like him.

my grammy (dad's mom) is nosey, but in a good way. she always has to know everything about everyone. she'll ask me a thousand questions before i leave the house to go out with a friend, but i know it's cuz she cares. she complains too, because her hips are real bad. i know she is tired of not being able to move like she used too. i feel bad for her cuz they can't seem to help her. hopefully her surgery on FEB 13th will cure the pain. she loves me enough to bribe me with food such as steak and goolash to keep me at her house one more day. she says she loves it when i come visit or stay for the summer, but i really don't see how. i take over the middle bedroom, which is where her closet is. i try to keep it clean, but it's hard when i don't have a place to put things. she makes me laugh a lot, because she isn't always all the way there. i love her.


both sets of my grandparents have the same arguments and it makes me giggle. i know that can be worse on the situation, but i cant help it. it always starts with the guy not being able to hear their wife. they talk in circles and it takes them 10 minutes to figure out what they were trying to say. they love it when i am there (most of the time) to sort things out for them. they are humorous.