Curveball

I need to learn to let go of the things I have no control over. I usually don't have so much stress kept up inside of me, but I feel like I am surrounded by people who do not understand what I am going through. My fellow student teachers have all passed the test. It has been one day, one long day and I am about to lose my mind. I took a nap today, not because I was tired (although that was part of it), but because I needed to turn off my mind and relax. I can't tell you the last time I relaxed.

I am writing this down, so I can get it off my chest. I feel like I am crashing down and I cannot stop it. I feel my God doing the best He can to comfort me and surround me with people who care. I will be forever grateful for that, but I still feel myself backing up into a corner.

I don't want to hear anymore about the economy and zero jobs for teachers. I just want to focus on one day at a time. I need to get passed tomorrow, because my students depend on me to bring all of my personality and joy to the classroom. That is when I feel they learn more, when I want to be there. Last week was rough and I know they could feel my lack of concentration. I don't want this week to be the same.

Lord, bring me new joy in the morning! Let your light shine down!